WALLFLOWER

I Miss My Nana

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When I was really little, my grandmother Nana lived in the city, and we would walk on summer nights to get ice cream or pancakes. On these nights my grandfather Papa would walk with us and smoke his cigar, and the smell of the cigar mixed with the night air and traffic. We would walk very slow, and their hands were very old and strong. My Nana’s house felt very safe. It was blue and yellow inside- everything was blue and yellow- and you could look out the big window and see the sea below. She lived way up high on the 12th floor. She had a music box, an old fashioned one from when she was a girl, and we would dance ballet to it but it was a little bit broken. She had a percolator for coffee and it made a rhythmic sound. On these mornings, the kitchen was very warm and smelled like toast. I can eat five pieces of toast with strawberry  jam, and Nana would read the paper. At night we would eat rocky road ice cream and watch a game show. She like those. Sometimes we would eat corn flakes for dinner. She was a very smart dresser- she always wore a knit outfit and pumps. She wore very bright lipstick and her hair was jet black. Her name was Lillian. My Nana passed away, but I swear sometimes when I see a hummingbird or a butterfly or any kind of small bird, really, I think it’s her. Maybe after you die you can be in many places at once- like your soul is in many birds. My mom said when I am older she will give me Nana’s wedding ring to remember her- a sparkly piece of her that is very bright like diamond snow.

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